Creative Musings from a Joyful Heart

     Today has been a cool, slightly overcast day here in upstate NY.  Although I love the sunshine, this was a perfect day to spend time tending the vegetable garden… no overheating and best of all, no bugs! 

     Just a little hoeing around the squash, cucumbers and the experimental watermelon tidied up one end in no time.  A bit more time required down the row of beans as I tenderly transplanted some overcrowded seedlings to a less populated area… how I hate to just pluck them out and toss them on the ground. :)  The row of lettuce is just starting to look established;  soon the boys will forget their impatience with the rest of the plantings and have the fun of harvesting part of our dinner salad.  

     After a few trips back and forth with the watering can my peaceful reverie… (these are chores?)… is complete.  I brush off my knees before heading back to the not-so-peaceful world inside the cabin door… I can already hear Little One squealing with laughter as Big Brother (today Indiana Jones) chases him through the “jungle camp” he’s created with what seems like every blanket and pillow in the house.

     Returning my spade and gloves to their home in an old milk bottle basket, my thoughts are on the tufts of weeds growing here and there around the edges of the house… it’s hard to believe that we still have so much “stuff” in storage and it seems that the weed trimmer is one of them.  Bending down to tame some of the unruly mess near the door a bit of red catches my eye… lifting the leaves I see… strawberries!  Wild strawberries like small red jewels cover the ground all along the edge of the house.  I had seen them growing earlier this spring, but they never seemed to develop much more than a leafy presence that I welcomed for the color when so much was still brown.  Long since forgotten and overgrown they are now an unexpected surprise.

     Isn’t it a joy to find something wonderful beneath the “weeds”?  Has this ever happened to you?  Something good arising from something that seems, in the present, to be bad?

     Just before Chip was conceived I was diagnosed with a tumor on my pituitary gland… this was a discouraging time with scans, tests and seemingly bad news at every turn.  Then one day, within just a few weeks of treatment, I received a phone call to stop taking the medication I had been recently prescribed because “your test came back positive”.  What test?  What’s wrong with me now???  The nurse on the other end of the line explained to me that they had done a blood pregnancy test as part of the recent testing during a biopsy I had undergone and the results were positive.  I picked myself up off of the floor and asked her to repeat herself as I was sure she had just told me I was pregnant.  I was.  We had been trying to start our family for fourteen years and now the impossible had quietly happened.  Strawberries under the weeds.

     As I paint and design this happens too, although not on such a grand scale as a new baby! *grin*  The completed design seldom looks like the sketch that I began working from.. sometimes it barely resembles the original idea even!  Sometimes the process is a joyful time of creativity and discovery… other times it is filled with discouragement and doubt, each stroke a struggle until suddenly it pulls together.  The thing that never ceases to amaze me is that the times in which the process “hurts” the most are usually the pieces that I love the most when completed… in that regard, maybe it is a bit like a baby!   

    Self-doubt, discouragement and fear can creep up on all of us but when we use them to become stronger, practice harder, and boldly fill our lives with color we become better for it and within ourselves will find the joy of blessings from weeds.

When I was in the third grade I loved to swing.  At recess I would race to the playground in hopes of getting the swing right across from a huge old oak tree that shaded the yard.  Kicking my feet and leaning back further and further my goal was to touch the tips of the leaves that, to me, were at the very top of the tree.  I can still remember the feeling of breathlessness as I would soar higher and higher!  Then it would happen… my senses would reach overload as the wind whipped through my hair, the sound of the clanking chains rang in my ears, the sun warmed my face… and I would laugh.  I couldn’t help it… and I couldn’t stop!  The joy just bubbled out.  

I watched my sons playing together tonight and got lost in *their* joy. 

Not a care in the world, they threw all of the pillows from the couch to the floor and jumped from stepping stone to stepping stone.  ”Be careful, Little One” said Big Brother, “or you’ll fall into the river!”.  Round and round they walked, jumped and hopped until they collapsed into a pile of giggles.  Inwardly I was filled with thankfulness… I can remember worrying that the six years between them would get in the way of times like this.  I didn’t need to worry, oh how they play!

When was the last time YOU played?  Pushed aside the stresses and cares of life, job and responsibilities to feel your whole being fill with delight?  Laughed till tears streamed down your face and your sides hurt?  Jumped in a puddle?  What makes you feel like a kid again?

With two little boys I have to schedule my play time… but I do… and I’m so glad for it!  I sit down to paint and time stands still.  Bottles of paint start to take over my table and soon even my palette is a work of art!  While scrapbooking or making cards I pull out my “stuff” and get lost in sensory overload as beautiful papers, fibers and embellishments fill me with creative excitement!  Have you ever experienced this??? 

When I design and create I’m a child on the swings with the wind tugging at my pony tail… oh, come play with me! *Ü*

As a homeschooling Mom who has always been a science geek I love it that my 7 year old son (affectionately known here as “Big Brother”) adores science.  He has an amazingly curious and inventive mind and it is a pure joy to “do science” with him.  (His words, several times each day- “Can we do Science now?”…. think along the lines of traveling with your kids to the tune of “Are we there yet?” and you’ll “hear” him just as I do) *Ü*

During March and April we brought spring into the house a bit early with a unit study about plants.  One day, when it was especially cold outside, I opened a packet of bean seeds… little did I know they were magic beans, not unlike those that led Jack’s way to the giant!

After our lesson and some inspection under the magnifying glass Big Brother carefully laid several  seeds on a damp paper towel in a bed of wet cotton and placed them in our kitchen window where the warmth of the afternoon sun would wake them from their slumber.  Each day they were dutifully inspected and tended to with care, yet no sprouts appeared.  “Give them time, it will happen” I encouraged, yet inside I began to wonder if the seeds were just too old- they had been stashed away for many years in less than ideal circumstances.   At last, to the delight of both of us, tiny shoots emerged!  Big Brother was simply awed by the fact that those dry, shriveled up old seeds contained life!  What an opportunity to delve into deeper lessons with this little man!  I pray that the spiritual seeds planted will take root deep in his heart and allow him to climb to great heights!

The bean plants are now 12″ tall and tiny buds are forming, I’m not sure if the weather will permit us to transplant them outside before the flowers open or if we will be getting a hands on lesson in pollination, but thanks to the magic seeds these beautiful plants continue to offer a generous portion of food for thought every day.

Thought to ponder for today… so many areas in our lives can become dried up and seem to shrivel away.  Not just spiritually speaking- it could be relationships, contentment….. even our creativity!   Find a way to nurture a part of yourself that has been put away for awhile like those old seeds.  Water it with attention and give it the sunshine of a new enthusiasm… and watch it grow!

     Today was the first day Spring made her appearance here at our little cabin in the woods.  We are still surrounded by snow, but the earth is slowly reclaiming its’ rightful place… swallowing up the icy-white bite by bite.  We enjoyed a walk down the lane; Little One happily sploshing in puddles while Big Brother tromped through the remaining snowdrifts too lost in his own thoughts to hear me call to him as we turned toward the pond.  Just what fills a boys mind when the weather breaks and the warm air opens up the world to him again?  Whatever it is, I imagine he will be lost in those thoughts often in the weeks to come.

     As we walked I noticed the remains of leaves, pressed ‘neath the weight of the winter’s snow,  now almost transparent…  my mind wanders and I wonder how transparent I am?  Do my kids know how much I love them?  Their Daddy?  Do others see how much I love the Lord?  My heart sings with joy… can others hear the melody?  Even when life gets “heavy”, does my light shine from within?

     When I paint, I use transparent layers of color… the colors build upon one another creating new hues and richer tones.  Isn’t that just like life?  Our lives intertwine and each person who crosses our path leaves a trace of themselves on us, adding to our texture. 

Thought to ponder for today… what are you painting on the lives of those around you???  May the brushstrokes I leave on those around me be highlights and not shadows… reflecting the Light source of my life.